Vein of Gold: An Allegory About Following Your Dreams

Lakenda Wallace

Once upon a time there was a man who sought his fortune in the world. He was mining for gold—his own vein of gold.

Every morning he would go deep into the earth to a place where a pinnacle of rock stood in the middle of an underground lake. And there, every day, as he went to work, he would ask the question, “Giver, Earth, where can I find my vein of gold?” It was an unusual question, but more unusual was that the pinnacle of rock would answer without fail, “Follow your heart and follow your dreams and you will find your vein of gold.”

The man would concentrate and try to hear what his heart said. He would listen for intuition, calculate, and set off down one of the cave trails. In each of his quests, he found wonderful crystals of amethyst and citrine, but he still could not find his vein of gold.

Although the crystals were prized in the market and provided an income, he was tired of mining. The man wanted to do more fun things like play music and paint furniture. But he believed he needed to keep mining until he found his vein of gold. Once he had his vein of gold, he could afford to focus on his art. Once he found his vein of gold he would no longer have to go into the mine and then he could be happy.

This man’s wife loved him very much. She did not like to see him unhappy. So, she decided she would help her husband. She could search with him and together they might find this vein of gold sooner. Her husband was elated by this news. Together, they would find their vein of gold and then, finally then, they would be happy.

The next morning they went deep into the earth. They came to the place where the pinnacle of rock stood in the underground lake. There, the man asked the rock, “Giver, Earth, where can I find my vein of gold?” As always, the pinnacle of rock replied, “Follow your heart and follow your dreams and you will find your vein of gold.”

His wife was, of course, shocked. What an unusual rock! “What does it say? What does your heart say?”

The husband became solemn as he concentrated on the messages from his heart. He pushed himself past his wandering thoughts of music and furniture and focused on mining.

“Second from the right,” he said.

“You have a very practical heart,” replied his wife.

“And it can read maps too,” he laughed. “Come on, let’s find our vein of gold.”

But they did not find their vein of gold. They found beautiful amethyst, citrine, and even rose quartz, but no vein of gold.

“What beautiful gifts the earth gives us!” exclaimed the wife as she looked at their treasure.

“But not our vein of gold,” sighed the man.

“Do not be sad, Husband, look at this beautiful treasure. It will feed us for a month!”

“Yes, but not for a year,” he responded, “I will have to come back to the mines tomorrow.”

“Then I shall be with you,” said his wife.

The next morning they went deep into the earth. The came upon the pinnacle rock at the center of the underground lake. There the woman asked her husband, “Dear, if this vein of gold be both of ours, then let me ask today. Our hearts will work better together.” “Yes! Yes!” the man said excitedly, “That is the answer! Now we will find our vein of gold!”

The woman bowed deeply and asked, “Dear Rock, Giver Earth, where can we find our vein of gold?” The unusual rock answered, “Follow your heart and follow your dreams and you will find your vein of gold.”

“Well?” The husband inquired, “What does your heart say?”

The wife smiled as she thought of carving a gift of stone out of the amethyst they had been given. “My heart says, ‘Thank You’.”

“Beyond that,” the husband pushed.

“I cannot go beyond that,” the wife mused, “My heart is full of love and appreciation. It can only say, ‘thank you’.”

“You can’t find gold in ‘thank you’,” the husband replied testily. “My heart says, second from the right, down the passage to the left and up the hilly tunnel, just to the right after you round the corner.”

“You have a practical heart,” she said. “But I cannot dig today, for I must follow my heart.”

“Where,” he asked.

“To say ‘thank you,” She kissed her husband and started back the way they had come.

And so the man went down the second from the right, to the passage on the left and just up the hilly tunnel on the right, just after rounding the corner. His wife sat at the mouth of the cave entrance with some of the treasure they had found the day before and began to carve.

She had so much fun! She carved a beautiful bird from the amethyst with its wings spread in full flight. She thought this might please the unusual rock, as birds did not fly that deep into the earth.

As she stood admiring her work, the mayor of the town happened by.

“Well, what a beautiful creation!” exclaimed the mayor.

“Oh, thank you,” she replied, “I was just making a gift.”

“Can you make another one? It is my wife’s birthday and I would love to give her one as a present.”

“Absolutely,” she replied excitedly. But just then, her heart unexpectedly spoke to her. “Wait. I'm sorry, Mr. Mayor. It is good work that I enjoy doing, but I told my husband I would help him mine his vein of gold.”

“I will pay you one month’s wages,” replied the mayor.

“Well, my husband cannot mind that!” She said, “I will carve a bird for your wife.”

“Can you make a penguin? She loves penguins.”

“Of course, that sounds like fun!”

And so the wife carved an exquisite citrine penguin for the mayor’s wife.

“It’s beautiful!” he exclaimed.

“Oh, thank you, Sir. It was very fun to do!”

Just then a couple came along the path.

“That is so beautiful,” remarked the man. “Absolutely gorgeous,” agreed the woman. “I must have one.”

“Well, I would love to make one for you. They are fun to do,” but just then her heart spoke to her. “Wait. I'm sorry. It is good work that I enjoy doing, but I told my husband I would help him mine his vein of gold.”

“I will pay you two months wages,” replied the woman as the man with her bobbed his head in agreement.

“Well, my husband cannot mind that! I will carve you a penguin.”

“Can you make a cat?” asked the woman.

“Of course. That sounds like fun!”

And so the wife carved a beautiful cat from the rose quartz she had mined with her husband the day before.

“It’s beautiful!” the couple exclaimed.

“Oh, thank you. Thank you,” said the wife, “It was very fun to do.”

Just then a holy man came along the path. “Why that is a beautiful cat,” said the Holy Man, “It was a creation of the heart.”

“Yes! It was from the heart,’ replied the woman. “It felt so good to hold the stone in my hand and carve out the hidden form beneath.”

“Because it is from the heart, it is a healing figure. Will you create a holy icon for my temple,” he asked.

Just then, the wife’s heart spoke to her. “It is good work I enjoy doing, but I told my husband I would help him mine his vein of gold.”

“I will pay you,” said the Holy Man.

The wife’s heart spoke to her again and she replied, “I will make your icon, but I cannot accept payment from you. It will be my gift of love to your temple.”

The holy man smiled.

Just as she was finishing the holy icon, her husband emerged from the cave after his day’s work. He was sad again because he had not found his vein of gold. Instead, he found fluorite and clear quartz. He saw a large crowd at the mouth of the cave and was eager to know what was going on. In the middle of the crowd was his wife, finishing a beautiful aventurine icon.

“This holy icon will give strength and courage. The work of your heart will inspire many,” praised the Holy Man.

“I thank you for inspiring me to create such a wonderful statue,” the wife answered gratefully. “I have never known such joy in a day’s work! I give you this gift, from my heart, with love.”

As she handed the Holy Man the icon, her husband could not help but interrupt. “You give?” he stuttered. “Why do you give?” He continued, his voice rising, “I have slaved all day in the deep, dark belly of the earth searching for our vein of gold while you have played with your silly carving! That is not a day’s work!” His face was red with anger, “I have worked hard for this stone and you just give it away! We cannot afford your heart and it’s ‘thanks,” he hissed.

Before the wife could tell him of her day’s earnings, the Holy Man held up a hand and quieted her. “Why do you believe this is play? Because it is enjoyable?” asked the Holy Man. “Work does not have to be slavery. Work must support you in body, mind, and spirit. If your body is fed, but your mind is starving for something more, the spirit will become depleted—unable to appreciate and absorb the nourishment of the body.” The Holy Man continued, “But if the spirit is nurtured and the mind is fully inspired, the sustenance for the body is only ever a prayer away.”

“Prayer will not fill my belly,” said the husband.

“You have a practical heart,” said the wife, as she handed him the three months of wages she had earned that day.

“Where did all this come from?” the surprised man asked his wife.

“I followed my heart and followed my dreams. Here is my vein of gold,” she answered. ”Now what does your heart say?”

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Love + Memories

Lakenda Wallace

Have you ever felt "less than"? Less than is the feeling of not being enough. It is associated with performance anxiety, imposter syndrome, and other depressive self thoughts. That is learned behavior. I learned it as a child through my parents, my older siblings, other kids at school, and, of course, comparing myself to everyone around me and always coming up short. But whether I was an outcast because of other people's mental wellness issues, the fact that I was the odd black kid out of an entire grade of 40 kids (and only one of two black families in the school K-6), we will never know. And, frankly, does it matter?

What matters is I am a grown-ass woman who must learn to feed and keep herself. Whether anyone tells you or not, how you feel about yourself is directly tied to your earning capacity, the lifestyle you will enjoy, and how much reciprocal loving relationships are in your life. In the immortal words of Ru Paul, "If you don't love yourself, how the hell are you going to love somebody else?"

Experience teaches us how to close off from intimate connections. Our brains are wired to keep us safe. One way it keeps us safe is by keeping great mental records (memories) of what has been good to you and what has been painful for you in past experiences. If a memory has been stored with what I will call a negative charge, it acts as a safety reminder, "This looks like something that has hurt us before!" This is true of open flames on stove tops, as well as situations and people.

I remember a friend dating a guy and it was going really well. So well, in fact, that he invited her to come to band rehearsal and meet his band mates. As we all know, meeting the inner circle is a big, positive step in a relationship. Well, she went and he was testy to her all night, actually rude to his band mates , and clearly overly jealous of even the most benign conversations she had with his friends. She did not understand what had happened. I asked her how his last relationship ended. She said, his girlfriend of many years cheated on him with a a now-former band mate. I thought, well that tracks for the behavior.

He became triggered when he saw her friendly interactions with his band mates. It would have set off the memory of his last girlfriend and the betrayal. He probably thought the way she was trying to be welcomed into his inner circle, i.e. "please like me and give me approval", was flirting. Was she flirting? No. But he was triggered, i.e. the pain of the last betrayal was stored into memory with a big-ass negative charge. He saw something that reminded him of the situation and reacted. Let's face it, we do not make good decisions when our trauma is triggered.

To love oneself is to support your own personal growth. To support letting go of past hurts so you can live unshackled in the here and now. A great step is to clean off these negative charges and store memories with a neutral balance charge. This process is best when anchored with a scent that feels cleansing to you. The scent will allow you over time to not only clear these issues faster, but store that memory with a positive-leaning memory of feeling refreshed, lighter, and maybe even cathartically clearer than before the meditation.

Feeling loveable starts with knowing you are loveable. That means YOU must love you. The more you take steps to untether yourself to past hurts, the more capable, whole, and happy you will feel. You have the power to affect your world. Step one is retracing the steps that made you feel less than in the first place. Not to blame, but to release and forget.

Choose one triggering experience (i.e, not feeling good enough to do something, not trusting people, no trusting yourself, etc.) You will not cure EVERY issue associated with this feeling at once, but you can heal some layers of the onion of pain that makes up the idea of Not Good Enough, or I Can't Trust Anyone each time you use the meditative practice below. Remember, nothing happens all at once, but each step forward is a lighter step towards the freedom to be 100% you and 100% present in each moment. And that, you will find, is real freedom.

Anchoring Scent Practice
Use a scent that feels clearing, whether a eucalyptus diffuser, burning a sage bundle or whatever. Be safe when burning materials and be sure their is some ventilation in the room. Too much smoke is not good for nasal passages or lungs. Room sprays, perfumes, and diffusers are also a great way to introduce the scent that works for you.

Now close your eyes for a meditation. Allowing yourself to be grounded and connected to the Earth. Breathe through to relax muscles and step into a deeper sense of calm.

Now we will use your imagination. First, we will travel to the center of your head and here we will access your Control Center. This is the place where you can control everything in your life. I usually picture something reminiscent of the Captain's Chair on the Star Trek Bridge, but you can picture whatever feels right for you--a throne, the perfect gaming station with all the controls, whatever.

From your Control Room bring up a screen and ask that memories associated with whatever is triggering you be shown on the screen. The memories fly by, but they are light and blurry. The idea is not see and reexperience all the traumas connected to your triggering moment, but rather to let them flit by on the screen. Your brain will do this without your needing to select and assess each one.

Now imagine a tank, resembling a fish tank rises up around the screen and begins a deep cleansing of everything on the screen. Breathe the scent deeply and feel the detritus of past experiences cleansed away. There will remain a dark, sludge like substance that gathers at the bottom of the screen that remains in the tank, as we allow the newly cleaned memories on the screen to rise and re-file themselves in your memory files with a neutral charge. The dark sludge of the negative associations remain in the tank.

These we wash again with the intention of letting these triggering moments go. This is not a "forgive and forget" moment, rather a release of the poison associated with these triggering situations. Continue to breathe. As this sludge is cleaned a second time through the tank you watch as the sludge becomes lighter in color and less dense in mass, until it is a light grey fog in the tank. We then allow a rinse of rose gold light to shine through the gray fog, taking over he gray and watch as the fog becomes lighter and lighter and then disappears from the tank. All that is left is the rose gold light.

Now allow the rose gold light to filter out leaving the clean clear tank. Thank the tank and yourself for doing this work. Continue to breathe and allow the now empty tank to sink back into the floor.

It may seem like you have not done much, but you have leap-frogged your experience past old memories that can block your view of what is happening in truth, in real life, in front of you. Continue to breathe. Thank your control panel room at the center of your head and allow yourself to move out of this space, close the door, and inhabit the entirety of your body. Feel your body sitting, hear the sounds in the room and beyond, smell the scent you have added to anchor this experience and slowly, gently open your eyes.

You may find that the new experiences that tripped your trigger wires are not as upsetting as they used to be. In fact, you may wonder why that "thing" does not bother you as much. You are learning to take control of your present by being less attached to all the things that hurt you in your past.

Supportive Scents
Modern Peasant offers natural, supportive scents for sensitive people. These are our recommended formulas for this exercise. Spray to set the space and clear the energy that no longer serves you.
Cleansing Room Spray (Palo Santo + Lavender), Tough Love Room Spray (White Sage + Rose)

Aromacology Helpers
The aromatic forms of these plants can be used including essential oils, extracts, hydrosols, or, of course, the fresh natural plant. If you are using essential oil add a few drops to a carrier oil like coconut, almond, or even olive oil before applying to your skin.
Palo Santo, Sage, Lavender, Pine, Cedarwood, Lemon, Cypress, Juniper, Eucalyptus

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